I used to really hate Apple because I thought it was for pretentious bastards who sit at coffee bars in turtle necks with their hipster beards. The glasses on their face is something the won in a who's less of a man contest with Lisa Lobe and anything you do with a computer has to be done in public so people can see your Apple logo and know you are better than they are while you write the next big novel or edit some sort of graphic art project for some company called "N".
Haha. You just described me exactly! Except that I just paste an Apple logo on my HP laptop and the beard hangs off my ears.

Reminds me of the time someone accused me of writing an article in a Starbucks in a turtleneck with a smug look on my face just because I praised the iPhone. In reality, I've never been to a Starbucks, I use a desktop PC with Windows XP in a dark cave of an office with no one else around, and I don't even have a face. But Apple hardware is pretty awesome most of the time. Would that we could all afford it.