I have to admit that I’ve murdered more than my fair share of virtual people. I always go for the head shot in Gears of War. I run down pedestrians in Grand Theft Auto like it was going out of style. There’s something about the thrill of spilling innocent pixelated blood while hearing digitized screams of absolute terror that keeps me coming back for more, time and time again. And until the McClinsky-Grinhold Virtual Rights Act of 2042 passes, I should be free to indulge in the simulated murder-violence of virtual humans.

Seeing that this is a “vintage gaming” site, I thought I would take a look at some of the “great moments” of digital simulated violence in the past. My only complaint is that, prior to 1989, video game graphics were not sophisticated enough to depict gushing, free-flowing rivers of crimson plasma with any regularity. You kinda had to use your imagination to fill in the blanks. Bummer. Nonetheless, in this column we’ll be taking a look at an early pioneer in senseless virtual bloodshed, Thorn EMI Video’s Carnival Massacre for the Atari 800 computer system. Carnival Massacre is a 1983 classic that, with a few minor changes, could quite possibly have been the greatest game of all time.

[ Continue reading Great Moments in Video Game Violence: Carnival Massacre » ]

Haven’t you always wanted your very own personal desktop information terminal? With a 9″ monochrome monitor? That requires a $15-an-hour text-only information service to use to its fullest? For the same price as a full-fledged PC? Neither did anybody else, and that’s why it was on clearance in 1986.

The XT300 ActionStation came with “$15.00 of free usage” for CompuServe, which, according to the catalog, “will vary between 1 and 2 hours” of connect time “depending on when it’s used.” This makes the old “100 Hours Free!” AOL offer look like a bargain!

Here’s some more info on the GTE XT300, from Communication News, February 1985:

GTE’s XT300 ActionStation combines an ASCII terminal with build-in modem and nine-inch high-resolution screen with a full-feature electronic telephone, speaker phone and large-capacity speed dialer. The ActionStation’s two-line capability allows simultaneously voice and data transmission, and the unit provides access to a wide range of data transmission and retrieval services, including GTE’s Telemail electronic mail service and online public data-base services. A personal directory permits storage of 50 names and telephone numbers, and eight computer sign-on procedures. It also stores 12 frequently used commands, report names and data file names of up to 36 characters.

[ Scanned from a COMB Catalog, ca. 1986 ]

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I see now that my previous weeks’ challenges have been too easy! Either that, or you guys are just too good. Time for a real challenge. This week’s theme is “Fantasy Beat ‘Em Ups.” Think Golden Axe, but not. That should help you pin them down. The first block is to the right, the other two are below. As always, post your guesses in the comments section of this entry, and don’t be bashful. Good luck!

    

The answers to the last challenge are after the break.

[ Continue reading Name Those Pixels: Challenge #9 » ]

What’s in a name? Well, if it’s the name of a game for a Nintendo console, there’s a strong chance that part of the system’s name will make an appearance. Popular examples of this practice include the game title Super Metroid for the Super NES and Super Mario 64 for the Nintendo 64. I call this phenomenon “system-naming,” for lack of a better term.

System-naming is largely isolated to games produced for Nintendo systems due to the company’s penchant for adding “upgrade” prefixes (the “Super” in “Super NES”) or suffixes (the “64″ in “Nintendo 64″) to their system titles. We’ll take a look at some instances of non-Nintendo system-naming near the end of the article.

So what does “system-naming” matter? The answer, quite simply, is nothing. Really — nothing at all. This is an exercise in pure console nerdlyness. Information for the sake of information. So if you’re easily scared away by the academic study of trivial minutia, turn away now!

Still there? Ok. Let’s take a look at each Nintendo system, tally up their system-named games, and see which system ultimately wins the battle of the names. All percentages have been rounded up to the next whole number. Sources for the data presented are listed at the end of each section.

[ Continue reading Super Game 64 Advance DS: The Nintendo Game Naming Formula Revealed! » ]