Computer shopping in the Fortress of Solitude.

In this ad for the SOROC IQ 120 and IQ 140 terminals, we see a woman who clearly wants to interface with something — but what? Very few peripherals understand the cryptic FAJI/NA protocol (Female Anatomical Jiggy Interface / Network Access). Even with the proper connector and hardware handshaking, those few who succeed in uploading might end up with a virus.

Oh, I get it…they’re talking about the terminals. Nothing to see here. Move along. Move along.

Discussion Topic of the Week: Have you ever regularly used a text-based terminal to get serious work done? Tell us about it.

The Euro-American family in its native habitat.

Just in time for Thanksgiving — and the ritual practice of family togetherness — comes this wonderful vintage photo from the back of the NES Action Set box. In it, we see a four-person white American nuclear family utterly consumed by a game of Super Mario Bros.

This scene looks nice at first glance, but imagine having to play through a whole game with mom and dad hanging off of your shoulders.

“Hey son.”

(Father gets in close, whispering into son’s ear.)

“Want to play some Super Mario Brothers?”

“I’m already playing, Dad.”

(Father squeezes son’s shoulder tighter.)

“My uncle’s name is Mario.”

Luckily, the scenario I’ve concocted above appears nowhere on the box. Still, a few amusing things about this photo jump out at me:

• Mario is gleefully flying to his death.
• The family apparently owns two copies of Super Mario Bros. because one is on the table, and they’re playing one in the NES.
• The two kids are both playing a one player game at the same time. Or maybe the older brother (player 1) on the right is screwing up the little brother’s game by hitting pause at random intervals.
• The mother and the son on the right aren’t looking at the TV set. Actually, I don’t think any of them are.

I’ve included an extra-large scan this time (when you click on the image), so you might be able to turn it into a desktop background.

For more vintage family madness, check out my latest slideshow on Technologizer.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Discussion Topic of the Week: Have you ever played a video game with your entire immediate family rapturously engaged in the action on screen?

Amongst all the heady VC&G anniversary festivities (I’ve been to five parties this week alone*), I almost forgot to tell you about a new VC&G-related article that popped up last week on Technologizer. It’s by a guy named Benj Edwards, which probably explains why I’m writing about it here.

For my latest Technologizer article, Classic PCs vs. New PCs, I selected six vintage personal computers from yesteryear and figured out what you could buy today for the same price. And we’re not talking original retail price here; I took inflation into account.

For example, the Commodore 64 — once considered a low-cost home computer — originally sold for the equivalent of $1,331.62 in 2009 dollars. Today you can get quite a bit for that much money. How much? That’s what we’re going to find out.

* Five all-nude FORTRAN coding jamborees, invitational

Yep, it’s that time of year again: time for VC&G’s famous Video Game Halloween Costume Ideas — 2009 edition.

This article series is almost an institution now, as we enter our fourth year of providing last-minute costume suggestions to desperate video game nerds everywhere. Each of these costumes is guaranteed to get you candy, or your money back. After you’re done reading, feel free to post your own costume suggestions in the comments below.

[ Continue reading VC&G’s Halloween Video Game Costume Ideas (2009) » ]

And you thought eatin’ shrooms to grow bigger was strange. How about this: flying green crabs dropping red clay bricks on a grinning, toothy duck wearing a cape and glasses with a double-barrel shotgun coming out of his mouth.

At least it’s set in a pond, so the backdrop isn’t too fanciful.

The game is Deadly Duck for the Atari 2600, a 1982 shooter title published by 20th Century Fox. I’ve played it, and it’s not too bad. It’s a vertical shooter, similar to Space Invaders and Demon Attack.

You play as a duck striving to gun down flying crabs that drop bricks on you — actually, around you. When the bricks land, they temporarily impede your movement to the left or right, then disappear in a few seconds.

This is one of the many vintage video game box illustrations that rendered the typically absurd and abstract situations of extremely low resolution games in a very realistic and literal manner. Super Breakout for the 2600 is one of my favorites (it also inspired a 2006 Halloween costume suggestion).

You can find many more examples of this curious art form on the web, including many parody boxes, so watch out for fakes.